PLEASE READ THESE TERMS:
Do you know I can't balance job and stuties?
Do you know I'm the chair-lady of Simei TKD?
Do you know I'm TKD brown belt already?
Do you know why I stayed at home during the holidays instead of going out?
Do you know that I feel very vindicated by you?
Do you know I tried to do so many things just to make you like me more?
Do you know I never wanted this to happen between you and me?
Do you know How I really feel?
Do you know me?
I'm just trying so hard to laugh...
Feeling like fuck since the beginning of this week. No pocket money, surviving on nothing, one full meal a day thats all the shit I got. I hate it. I'm not working..there is no other income already for me except for pocket money. I wanted to work, but you fucking people don't let me work what I like! Than I don't have money to eat..the basic need to daily life. I'm starving from the moment I woke up until dinner time. FUCK! Woke up every morning with gastric pain. I don't get gestrics last time..but since last year I'm starved so badly that I developed gastric pain easily! And I think my body is mul-functioning. I meanrly walked a short distance and I'm like panting, wobbly legs and heavy arms. I didn't tell my parents about this especially my mother (cause i don't think she'll listen and start talking before I'm done with my words). I could never get my message across to her. I hate this! She hate me!
Yeah, you people reading might be thinking that I'm self centered. My mom works hard everyday and yet I not understanding to her, letting her have my way. But please, you don't fucking know me well. Sometimes I just feel like ending my life. I have depression yet didn't consult a doctor..my arents don't know about it too. I'm just going nuts. I'm suffering....
Your Hated Daughter.
Today, I went to get a hair cut again. Been wanting to cut my hair since 2 weeks ago. So I got it cutted before I'm heading off to my grandparents' place this weekend at m'sia. I missed them so much! But my darling boyfriend and girlfriend can't come along with me. =(
There is something up my chest that I got to let it out somewhere! Its about my boyfriend. Whenever he is with his friend's I'm close to nothing to him. his attention is all around his brothers. They are more important. This thing not only happened a time..especially last saturday! We went to watch TMNT with some of his friends..there I'm reduced to almost nothing. Not really spoked to me. I don't smoke, neither am I in their gang. What to do? I'm just nothing when with his friends. I'm kind of sick of these....
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Monday,
send him and went to school take exam. Come home after the paper and slept. SMS boyfriend and waited for his calls/replies.
Tuesday,
Wake up in the late morning and got ready for sentosa with my classmates. haha!! Had so much fun! Melvin can't come as he fell sick and boon didn't come as he got to do someting to his cabinate at home. haha! Left the for of us, Shally, Li Yin, Jasmin and me. We took the SENTOSA EXPRESS to beach station and went to siloso. We're so sua ku when taking the SENTOSA EXPRESS! Took a some photos, wanted to sun tan but the sun was not that strong. We sat there facing the sea and realised that its so relaxing! I don't know what to think about there as compared to at home, I tend to think about relationship, money, studies, home, etc. Sat around, chatted, played with water and went to bath. Went back to vivo had our dinner and shopped around. Waited for my boyfriend to call. So, thats how my day passed by.
Wednesday,
met up with Elson to go beach road. Wanted to got my boyfriend a cap, he asked me to. Went to daniel's house first before going beach road. Ate and take some cosmatics home. haha!! He is my supplier. Than waited for them to get ready go beach road. Looked so many shops for hte cap my boyfriend wanted. Than Suyu and I saw a guy wear the cap that my boyfriend wants. So We asked him where he got the cap. He bought it from flash and splash for only $15. Thought of going there if couldn't buy his cap here. But ended up I found a dirty green cap for only $8. So cheap! Shopped around, went downstairs and had a cup of loongan drink and took bus 2 to school for tkd training. Elson went homee after shopping with us. Tkd training, I realised that I dhave damn lousy stamina. As a chairman, I'm the worst. Is it because of my condition worsened or I didn't train enough? Anyway, got to think of ways to buck up myself!!!! Messaged my boyfriend and waited for his reply.
Thursday (tomorrow),
Planned to meet my darling Ganga in the afternoon to buy handphone. Finnally my N73!! Going to get it tomorrow! haha!! I just can't wait. hopefully I get the phone and everything goes smoothly. After buying, go home and charget he new phone.
Friday,
if my boyfriend is out by than I'll meet him. If not I'll spent my day with moM..AND MY NEW PHONE!!! WAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I miss my boyfriend!!!!! Can't wait for him to come back...but sometimes he is also abit of disappointing to me. Like today, I bought him the cap, told him is dirty green colour..his fist reaction is "EeeEeEe...". Sigh, so sad upon hearing this.
Today is the day my boy is going NS at Pulau Tekong for a week. Met him up early in the morning as he need to be at Tekong by 8. We chatted about alot of things on our long journey to the east. I really missed him alot, can't bear to see him go. I know its just a week, but...Anyway, we parted at 7.15pm at Tampinese MRT. I wish that this week will pass by faster!! So I could see him. haha!! I MISS MY BOYFRIEND VERY VERY VERY MUCH! But I can't call him as his phone batt only left 1/2 and need to survive until satureday! Now, all I can do is send him a message and wait for him to call me at night before he turns in.......
Tomorrow I'm going sentosa with a few of my classmates, meeting them at 12. Hopefully I could wake up earlier. If not I'll be late again. Was late last week for a exam, damn! Stupid traffic Jam and damn my laziness! Going to have fun tomorrow!!!!
I'm going to get myself Nokia N73 by this week! I'll hate myself to the core if I can't get it. GrRrRr~!! It so cheap now.
N73 N73 N73 N73 N73 N73 N73 N73 N73 N73 N73 N73 N73 N73 HERE I COME!!!!!!
My handphone alarm rang I switched it off and went back to sleep (how dump of me). My paper was starting at 8.30 and I only woke up at 8am! Rushed to brush my teeth and get ready for the exam. Not enough cash went to withdraw $30 for the cab fare. (1) Quickly went to flag for a cab, than standing infront of me was some bloody idiot who was flagging the cab too! So they 2 got the cab than my turn. Damn them, I'm rushing for exam ok! (2) Than was in the cab, kind of relieve as it should reach my school in 30mins..but who knows the PIE JAM!!!!!!!!!!!!! DAMN! Stuck in the Jam for so long and Anthony, my CA, called asking where am I. He was stuck in the Jam too! haha!! By than its already very late, so Anthony asked me to go and get a MC. I asked the cabby uncle to get out of the PIE via the nearest exit. Anyway, I'm near Toa Payoh asked the uncle send me to the poly clinic to get MC. The cab is damn!! $24++ but he uncle only charge me $22. My goodness! The cab fare is actually enough for me to get o school, but because of the stupid jam I ended up in Toa Payoh with a very expensivee CAB FARE!!
Than in the polyclinic, went to register, its damn expensive for PR. Sigh....prices increase. (3) The person assigned me to a room where there's no doctor. What the hell!! Than The nurse explain that the doctor is newly transfered here, he's learning some proceedure thing about the clinic. (4) I waited for 1hours just to get a stupid MC. Aske d the doctor what is those things growing on my fot and he said VIRUS INFECTION, warts or something!! SO SERIOUS! So they refered me to the Skin Centre near novena. After consulting the doctor the referal counter asked me make payment first than come back and collect the referal letter and appointment date. (5) But I forgotten all about the referal letter after making payment and went off to meet Ganga at orchard! By the time I remember I was already in the train at novena station. So got U-turned all the way back(take MRT & switch to bus) to the clinic just for the Appointment Date and Referal letter. Sigh....
Reached orchard and met up with ganga. Told her everything happeend that morning! Tha went to eat with her, all else was fine when Melvin called. (6) He told me that monday got to retake WIM paper! DAMN!! what The hell happened I asked him. He replied that it difficult ot say via the phone, tell me on monday. My book was in locker, how to study sia! SIGH!!!!!!!
My boyfriend, he is going into army in 5 days time. The coming monday. I MISS HIM even before he goes in.
There is motocross this weekend @ *scape. I'm jealous..why do other people alwasy get what they wanted while I'm just here not getting what I've wanted. I hate my life. I hate you people controlling me. I hate Cars don't ask me go get a car licence instead of bike. I hate it!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I get so pissed off always becuase of things like things. It may be small things for you but not me, you had your dream and might be on the way of making it come true. I'm not, my dream, parents and boyfriend will never agree to it. They are always disagreeing to what I do.
My boyfriend said that I could get the licence and own a bike at first when I register last year. But once I got kids I cannot ride bike again. I agreed unwilling. I want to cry! But now, he won't even let me go for theory lessons! Its so unreasonable. He said something that totally let me down that night, "I'll NEVER have a girlfriend who ride a bike. NEVER!" I'm so hurted and disappointed to hear these words coming out of his mouth.
Stress 1:
Boyfriend, he went to MOS without telling me last night.
Kept saying me irritating him.
Don't accompany me go out shopping.
Stress 2:
The moment my mom came home this after she started to shout at me.
Irritated.
Shouting at me to hang the laundry, fold the clothes.
I'm not the maid in the house.
My sister is sleeping, brother in school while I have to to do everything!!!!!!!
GrRrRrR~~!!
Stress 3:
Studies, I tried so hard to study but, Sigh....
Force my eyes on the book, but my mind is else where.
Exam is just next week!!!
2. They do it on more than one surface
3. They hit from any angle
4. They grunt when the action heats up
5. They're good with their hands
6. They do it with 2 or 4 people
7. They've got endurance to last 3 hours or longer
8. They wear tiny skirts for easy play
9. They know how to stroke it
10. They do it for unlimited minutes in many different postitions
11. They like to be on top of their game
12. They enjoy getting hot and sweaty
13. They work the balls really well
14. They know how to take it up the middle
15. They play the court until they score
SO FUNNNYY!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAHAHA!
My weekend was not bad. Spent the nights with my secondary schoomates. Missed them alot!! Especially my ALISON baby! We sang K and I'm the first one to get drunk. I puked and left the place earlier than planned. We really drank. So fun with them, Alison, WeiNi, Jeremy, Eng Kiat, Kelvin, Shi Zheng, Jia Kang, Jin Long. Sang and shouted! They even sun the hokkian drama song!! My goodness, so uncles..LOL!!! I had a very very wonderful Saturday night. Happy 19th Birthday Alison!
Sunday evening went to BBQ organised by Wei Ni. I was there quite late due to the stupid banglahs. They hooked up on the ATM machine quite some time and the ue was freaking long. Reached the place about 9.30pm. Ate bee hoon and BBQ chicken wing. Chit Chatted with them. Reminiscing about the secondary school times. The bad tings we've done and how we used to steal things around, etc. So much more about our best time of our lives. Until now I still think that my 4 years of secondary school life is the best! =D I missed those times. But I know I got o move on and face this cruel world.
yesterday morning went otschool for lesson at 8am. Sat on the same table with Kah Fai. I asked him to shift here with me instead of sitting with sharon they all. haha! I don't want to see my friend from NITEC until now suffer. They are no good people. After that lesson Anthony's lesson cancelled, so we have 3 hours break. SO boring!!! Studied abit here and there and chit chatted again. Soon came Ricky and Lynn (the couple). They sat down the same table as us. But from ym view, Lynn treats ricky very bad. She totally got no respect for Him! A guy...She hit hsi head and scolded him "STUPID!" infront of us! Totally didn't care about his pride. Jessie got say "woah! how could you treat ricky like this infront of us?" They both replied " oh! Used to it already" Ricky isn't happy at that time, could easily tell from his facial expression. Sigh...why do this kind of thing happens. Anyway, I shouldn't say much from a 3rd party point of view as I do not know what exactly happens daily in their lifes. haha! All I could say is "POOR RICKY!"
Enough of my essay writting.
Off to bed now.
Sweet dreams!
So tired. This weekend will be very busy! Saturday 8am to 7pm IVP at NTU. Than 9pm KBox and Jurong East Alison's Birthday all the way to 3am. Sunday 8am to 7pm IVP again at NTU. After that to my secondary school's BBQ gathering. maybe 10+ I'll go home rest. hehe!
Just now I made 3 pairs of ear rings. Apair for my pretty birthday girl, Alison. A pair for my sister and one pair for myself. So nice! Michelle gave me this idea and thought me how to do. Thank You! =D The one with the ball is for Alison. The one beside is for my sister. And the last one is for myself (the most not good looking one). lolx. Its quite easy to make actually.
